what you say, we both go and seize the day?
i've been thinking about life in the moments, and how these small hours, these little wonders could be that much more beautiful. we miss them, sometimes, you know, little moments shared with others that amuse, touch, connect, warm. like the time i looked at diana when karl (my CG leader) said he missed bible study, or the time i was enjoying my ipod when i looked over and saw a women with her book open on her lap, listening intently to her ipod. she didnt know it, but in that moment i shared her enjoyment; the need to put down that book so that the song can get to you through and through. trivial, maybe, but i felt united with her for that very second.
then rational thought got the better of me, and the moment passed. i almost wished i could have grasped it.
anyway, i have a gig in 2 weeks and no new song to sing. then i realised i havent physically written anything creative in awhile. it's like a mental block to my creativity from i dont know what, which i hope to be able to break down soon. one thing is for sure though, i'm comfortable. but that's scary. and i dont want it to remain like that.
Dollies is over and i almost wished i could say done with. but i cant so i guess this is not good bye yet. you almost think that after 4 shows, the dim sum novelty would have worn off. but if the show consistently throws you new surprises, i guess it's not quite that way. which is a good thing i guess. i mean, it is to me, singaporean and it's these kinda things that make singapore a great place to live in. i was half working backstage anyway, and i miss my giant bitter gourd right now (yes, i made a giant bittergourd!). i hope if they dont want it i can have it. :) it's not a lady's finger OK! grr.
i came to the conclusion the other day, by the way, that it is only at dim sum dollies that i feel the slightest bit proud that i'm singaporean. and also, patriotic. i think the dollies make it a point. it just gives the show so much more heart, and it's one of the times i feel all warm and fuzzy about my country. on the night of the last show, i went to the esplanade viewing room with steph and several other volunteers and witnessed the sight of a theatre full of people waving singapore flags. i think the dollies really have got it right; this is what NDP should be. :)
which, leads me, i think into somewhat hostile territory, by making me want to rant about how i think singapore is NOT a democratic country, and that the whole world is plotting to make us think we are. in many ways, i think we resemble a communist state. national day parades that are similar to military parades, musicals written for the purpose of propagating a govt idea, an information ministry, and many other oddities in this country. it's a joke, really. but i have reasons to love it anyway; it is after all, a house, a shell in which my HOME exists. and yes, "if ever i leave, i will start to pine" for many things which are truly uniquely singapore. STB got at least, i think, half the story right :)
anyway. i've just successfully managed to rant about something totally random. i need to go and become rational again. i am tired. i want to su reep. :P
tired of losing battles with myself.
i've been thinking about life in the moments, and how these small hours, these little wonders could be that much more beautiful. we miss them, sometimes, you know, little moments shared with others that amuse, touch, connect, warm. like the time i looked at diana when karl (my CG leader) said he missed bible study, or the time i was enjoying my ipod when i looked over and saw a women with her book open on her lap, listening intently to her ipod. she didnt know it, but in that moment i shared her enjoyment; the need to put down that book so that the song can get to you through and through. trivial, maybe, but i felt united with her for that very second.
then rational thought got the better of me, and the moment passed. i almost wished i could have grasped it.
anyway, i have a gig in 2 weeks and no new song to sing. then i realised i havent physically written anything creative in awhile. it's like a mental block to my creativity from i dont know what, which i hope to be able to break down soon. one thing is for sure though, i'm comfortable. but that's scary. and i dont want it to remain like that.
Dollies is over and i almost wished i could say done with. but i cant so i guess this is not good bye yet. you almost think that after 4 shows, the dim sum novelty would have worn off. but if the show consistently throws you new surprises, i guess it's not quite that way. which is a good thing i guess. i mean, it is to me, singaporean and it's these kinda things that make singapore a great place to live in. i was half working backstage anyway, and i miss my giant bitter gourd right now (yes, i made a giant bittergourd!). i hope if they dont want it i can have it. :) it's not a lady's finger OK! grr.
i came to the conclusion the other day, by the way, that it is only at dim sum dollies that i feel the slightest bit proud that i'm singaporean. and also, patriotic. i think the dollies make it a point. it just gives the show so much more heart, and it's one of the times i feel all warm and fuzzy about my country. on the night of the last show, i went to the esplanade viewing room with steph and several other volunteers and witnessed the sight of a theatre full of people waving singapore flags. i think the dollies really have got it right; this is what NDP should be. :)
which, leads me, i think into somewhat hostile territory, by making me want to rant about how i think singapore is NOT a democratic country, and that the whole world is plotting to make us think we are. in many ways, i think we resemble a communist state. national day parades that are similar to military parades, musicals written for the purpose of propagating a govt idea, an information ministry, and many other oddities in this country. it's a joke, really. but i have reasons to love it anyway; it is after all, a house, a shell in which my HOME exists. and yes, "if ever i leave, i will start to pine" for many things which are truly uniquely singapore. STB got at least, i think, half the story right :)
anyway. i've just successfully managed to rant about something totally random. i need to go and become rational again. i am tired. i want to su reep. :P
tired of losing battles with myself.
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