'But sometimes it seems completely forbidden
To discover those feelings that we kept so well hidden
When there's no competition
And you render my condition
Though improbable it's not impossible
For a love that could be unstoppable'
- Never be the same again, Mel C.

everyone around me seems depressed, and i wished i could do something to help. it's these helpless times when i dread not having a purpose. but then again, it's sometimes the best state to be in. because anything above this is pure busy body-ness. when there's a need for space, it's a learning experience for me.

i constantly have to tell myself that people sometimes just need space.

if not i might just worry myself sick.

the week's been tough, and it's not ending yet. i should be doing my history paper, but well, that can wait. tomoro i do TSD.

or by the way. this weekend, it's Public P. i hope i'll see you there. :)

i believe people have the power to disillusion me. and the effect is bewildering. (is there such a word?) i shall not explain, but i'm very disillusioned, because sometimes the illusion you paint for yourself of something or someone just crumbles.

what happened to the family?

i thought we all would have something going on for us. and we'd all actually be rather ok. today i was faced with a sad truth. is it the time? or is it just that we all have to function this way? that we're all stuck in this vacumm, and when it's all said and done it fills with the bitterness of the real world? i wish i never had illusions of these.

i feel blinded.

i cant decide what kinda state of mind i'm in. i'm not depressed, not sad, but not over the moon either. i saw my scar today. freaky.

i almost cried.

it was just my imagination.