stuck with the sillhouettes of the non-existent.

i'm taking this very short period of recess where my boss leaves the office for her lunch to write this, because i really dont think it's a good idea to blog in front of her. in anycase.

:) baybeats rocked last night. the crowd was kinda tame though, and i really didnt feel like moshing because, a) the crowd was DAMN SCARY when they started pushing people around. and b) i just didnt really feel up to it. for one the music wasnt the most mosh worthy kind. it was good and all, but there was something lacking. except well, electrico was good, and the posies, albiet a little too heavy for me, rocked! other than that it wasnt quite what it should have been. simply put, it fell short of what expected baybeats to be.

it has, however, left me tired and not really feeling like i should be in the office at work. there is nothing much to be done also. tis irritating.

anyway.

i am blogging, a long one, so i think all of you would know it's going to get slightly emo.

well. i'm sorry. i try not to be. in a sense i'm just pissed off that i cant feel what i want to when i need to. just like how i want to be pissed with someone for cancelling on me, but i cant because it's just not right. because i fear i'm being over sensitive with my feelings and insensitive with someone else's.

on second thought. i dont really want to rant anymore. i'll just mourn the non-existence of friends who used to be there.

sometimes it's really not worth it being nice anymore. maybe dawn was right. i am too nice.

it's a little fucked up that i'm stuck here waiting, at times debating.