tears that felt like rain.

this specifically goes out to my shi fu crystal.

i cried. when i read your post about everyone.

not only because i was touched by what you said,

but also because i've let you down.

i wont say sorry again, because it's no use.

but i will say this: whatever faith you have left in me, please dont lose it. if there's none left then i guess i'll have to rebuild it.

but yes, even if you think we're not accountable to you, i think it's also about the whole friendship and everything. i dont think you can separate accountability from a friendship. so.

i hope you give me another chance. there's still gonna be a hand delivered christmas card waiting for you.

and i love you shi fu. i know i sound like i'm trying to suck up or whateva, but all my words are true. always have been, always will be.

i'm going to start rambling nonsense soon so i shall have to stop here.

the first cut is the deepest.