They say your middle name is trouble
But I know it's Caroline
They say you remind them of problems
But I think you look like Audrey

Caroline, I know
That you put on a show
Everytime you two disagree

This heart is a stone
No one will ever break it
This heart is a stone
Close to you it breaks easily
'Cause everything that they say
Tells me to go away
But everything that I feel
Tells me to stay

They say they can smell the drama
But I know it's "No. 5"
They say you only bring heartache
But I know you brought a bottle of wine

Caroline, I know
That you put on a show
Everytime you two disagree

This heart is a stone
No one will ever break it
This heart is a stone
Close to you it breaks easily
'Cause everything that they say
Tells me to go away
But everything that I feel
Tells me to stay

They say you're like a Monday morning
I say you're like a Friday night
I don't get their points
Anytime is a good time for being with you

This heart is a stone
No one will ever break it
This heart is a stone
Close to you it breaks easily
'Cause everything that they say
Tells me to go away
But everything that I feel
Tells me to stay

Acid House Kings - This Heart is a Stone

they are my new rave. i love this song. it's so simple a nice to listen to. :)

anyway. i am currently battling a flu and i'm going on holiday, i hope it goes away soon. GRR.

ok. just wanted to share the song :) gonna head off to sleep soon.

from east coast savvy to west coast street!

Hey, don't you worry, everything's alright you know
We're gonna be just fine
If the rain crashes down over you
I will love you dry

There is nobody in this world could ever take me away from you
I am always by your side
If you need someone to guide you dear
I'd like to try

Don't give up something you've never had before
(Never could but we would together)
I promise you this
You're the one I adore

Here it comes again
Filling my soul, never want to let go
Here it comes again
Be at one with your love as below so above

My love is flowing freer than a waterfall
Beyond the edge of time
Surrender to the emotion now we can fly
We can fly

And you know there's a reason
That we are who we are (who we are)
I can not resist
You're the one I adore

Here it comes again
Filling my soul, never want to let go
Here it comes again
Be at one with your love as below so above
Here it comes again

Just like there's always gonna be
A place for you and me
A ship that we can sail on
Just like if one and one were three
And everything was free
At the end of some rainbow
Just like a needle and a gun
A circle in a sun
And a knock upon a hidden door
It is you I adore

Here it comes again
Filling my soul, never want to let go
Here it comes again
Be at one with your love as below so above
Feel it coming again
Filling my soul, never want to let go
Here it comes again
Be at one with your love as below so above
Yeah yeah

- "here it comes again" Mel C

god put a smile upon my face.

have decided that being whiney about situations is more dangerous than acutally being in that situation. and so. time to look up and be more upbeat about things.

working as crew (well. somewhat. if you consider subtitles a part of the "theatrical" experience) is indeed an eyeopener, though in the area of learning much, i dont seem to be making much progress. anyway. MPD has been fun, albiet a little tiring as i try to keep on top of school and work at the same time. it's a relatively brainless task if you think about it; sitting behind tinted glass at a computer in a pool of blue lighting, pressing an up down button. but. just knowing i'm now in the theatre and not outside of it is exciting.

a thought has struck though; i mean, crewing and all may seem like fun, but it really depends on what you're doing. and it sometimes feels like it's kinda exclusive; like it's very difficult to make in-roads into the industry, even with contacts, because it always seems to be the same people who get all the jobs, and the stragglers and the outside people have to wait for the menial jobs to become available. if i'm going to make it in this industry it's time to be more friendly, not that by my standards i think i'm unfriendly or anything.

AH well. anyway. moving on.

this semester is proving to be more exciting than the past one. and the whole idea of maintaining my grades is tiring and may seem futile, but in an effort to remain optimistic i shall believe it can happen. what i know for sure, though, is that this semester is definitely more challenging, and there is hope yet, and my ideas and impressions of NUS are changing. it's the introductory stuff that seems unstimulating. but then, of course, it's obvious isnt it? it IS introductory stuff. how exciting can THAT get?

so all my NUS slamming, i say, has been ill informed. i am ready to concede that. the urge though, to go overseas still lingers. i'm still going to state that i feel like my future woule be brighter overseas.

but i shall not complain. i know i'm one who is prone to that. in anycase.

i have finished Arundhati Roy's "The God of Small Things" and i think it's brilliant. i could get used to that writing style. i know i spent a large part of that book trying to figure out where and when the story was being picked up from as each chapter unfolded. and i really liked the way she built up anticipation, letting you know something was going to happen, but not, at that particular point, revealing what that thing was. it was addictive. i could hardly put the book down. and i think it's one of the best books i've read so far. few books have that effect on me. and i've got to say this one is one of them. (which, it must be stated, is not meant to indicate i read alot. i dont, but relative to some people i know, i do.)

ok. i was supposed to hit the sheets and get some sleep. i am tired.

Yesterday is a promise that you've broken

dont wait up for me, if i'm not home.

I started up my hollow
A piece of wood to follow
A day that doesn't come to the lucky

And I realize there's tomorrow
But I would rather wallow in the rain
Than moods that seem so potlucky

Well, I'm cruisin' El Paseo
In my off-white coupe back '65
Oh, I'm cruisin' down my own street
And my hoopty says to me
You better hang on to your benchseat
I'm gonna take you for a ride

And I'll let you know
When it comes, when it comes
I'll let you know
But don't stay up for me
Don't wait up for me if I'm not home, yeah

So wait for fate to find me
A ball of string unwind me
Uncomfortable as a centerfold, yeah
And I realize you're behind me
To help and humankind me
To see my songs can be retold

Well, I'll be gone tomorrow
Yes, I'm on the road tomorrow
So, next time that I see you in school
It won't be for too long

And I'll let you know
When it comes, when it comes
I'll let you know
But don't stay up for me
Don't wait up for me if I'm not home, yeah

And I want a leather jacket
But only if I have the time
Well I'll comb my hair like Elvis
And grab an Old Gretsch '59
And you'd hardly recognize me
If you saw me from behind

And I'll let you know
When it comes, when it comes
I'll let you know (I'll let you know)
And I'll let you know, yeah
When it comes, just when it comes
I'll let you know (I'll let you know)
But don't stay up for me
Don't wait up for me if I'm not home, yeah

And I'll let you know, yeah
I'll let you know, yeah
But I'll let you know

"when it comes" - tyler hilton

before i realised what's happening to me in my recent bout of "sian-ness", the urge to disappear has begun again. today i questioned joy; what it means, and why is it i find it so hard to understand what joy entails. it occurred to me that i've never fully experienced joy; and so the resolution of the year, i think, is to find it, or at least, stop avoiding joy so it finds me.

all this talk about finding joy. SIGH.

ok. i gots ta go. man. tired.

ball of string unwind me.