Broken – Seether Feat. Amy Lee

I wanted you to know I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph; I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel light when you’re gone away

The worst is over now and we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high, you steal my pain away
There’s so much left to learn, and no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel right when you’re gone away

‘Cause I’m broken when I’m open
And I don’t feel like I am strong enough
‘Cause I’m broken when I’m lonesome
And I don’t feel light when you’re gone away

hehe ... new song ... i really love it!!! :)

few more papers to go ... TSD tomoro and then Prac Crit on fri ... have soooooo many plans for friday man!!!! yeah!!!! ok ok ... must focus first ... i am soooooo screwed for all my papers ... oh dear ... shall wait for harsh reality to hit before i say anything ... oh well ...

i am now going to prepare for TSD ... i will be back ... hehe =)

unclench your fists and unpack your suitcase

in future i shall produce nothing but flaming mudpies made of shit - Bertolt Brecht

ok ok ... the music's up ... so what do you think? hehe ... comments!

ah kok is leaving ... and that's terribly saddening ... sighs ... and i was only starting to get to know him ... oh man ... sighs ... i hope he has a good life wherever he goes ... haha ... =)

i'm in dire need of time ... so i shall go and sleep now ... btw, tell me what songs you want so i can upload to this page ... then you all ca hear mah! yeah ...

bye bye

unclench your fists and unpack your suitcase

it's just me ... hold your applause please ...

i was just thinking abt how dangerous it is to be showing too much of yourself ... haha ... i should know ... i do that on a regular basis ... but that's just me ... haha ... anyway, i'm thinking: does the true self of somebody really turn pple off? i mean, i've met pple who just cant take it you know, seeing the real person ... i dunno ... haha ... i just cant accept it if someone is not theirselves in front of me ... i mean, i really hate to peel layers and get to the bottom of things ... maybe i just have too much expectations ...

i am feeling the insecure bug coming again ... it's been there all along lah, but i mean, it surfaces for air sometimes ... and i feel like it's coming up ... this time it's a fear of pple seeing me as weak ... haha ... i guess i am ... but i can be strong if i am willing to lie to myself ... i mean, it gets tiring if you keep putting up a strong front ... so i suppose you just encounter the thing that makes you weak, feel weak and let it pass ... hmm ... you could choose to do something abt it when you feel weak ... but what can you do? these are just my thoughts lah ... i suppose being weak can be some sort of a strength? what is weakness anyway? something the stong came up with to describe those who do not measure up ... that's what i think ... i dont think anybody's weak ... (unless you're dependant on somebody or something ... or you just dont do things for yourself to make wrongs right) pple can be strong when they want to ... fro me? i choose when and where to be strong lah ... i've never really classified myself as weak before, cause i kept thinking i'm not ... haha ... but in a sense i know i am ... i mean ... deeo inside of you you know there's things that make you weak ... i wonder if acknowledging you're weak is a strength ... haha ... that's kinda like an oxymoron ... haha ...

ok ... been immersing myself in books lately ... i spent the whole day studying today ... i really did study ... i mean ... it was better than my previous attempts lah ... tonight it's TSD ... can you imagine? just one night for TSD ... of course there's the night before the exam and the morning of the exam too ... haha ... TSD is in the afternoon! yeah ... that's good ... haha ... tomoro it's both lit texts ... sat is for history ... and sunday is the final stretch for econs ... haha ... :) yeah ... i want to take 3 subs! haha ... ok ok ... enough ...

they're playing a cool song on radio now ... here are the lyrics ...

"Accidentally In Love"
by Counting Crows

So she said what's the problem baby
What's the problem I don't know
Well maybe I'm in love (love)
Think about it every time
I think about it
Can't stop thinking 'bout it

How much longer will it take to cure this
Just to cure it cause I can't ignore it if it's love (love)
Makes me wanna turn around and face me but I don't know nothing 'bout love

Come on, come on
Turn a little faster
Come on, come on
The world will follow after
Come on, come on
Cause everybody's after love

So I said I'm a snowball running
Running down into the spring that's coming all this love
Melting under blue skies
Belting out sunlight
Shimmering love

Well baby I surrender
To the strawberry ice cream
Never ever end of all this love
Well I didn't mean to do it
But there's no escaping your love

These lines of lightning
Mean we're never alone,
Never alone, no, no

Come on, Come on
Move a little closer
Come on, Come on
I want to hear you whisper
Come on, Come on
Settle down inside my love

Come on, come on
Jump a little higher
Come on, come on
If you feel a little lighter
Come on, come on
We were once
Upon a time in love

We're accidentally in love
Accidentally in love [x7]

Accidentally

I'm In Love, I'm in Love,
I'm in Love, I'm in Love,
I'm in Love, I'm in Love,
Accidentally [x2]

Come on, come on
Spin a little tighter
Come on, come on
And the world's a little brighter
Come on, come on
Just get yourself inside her

Love ...I'm in love

i'm goin now ... haha ... M butt is my bedtime story tonight ... yeah! :)

unclench your fists and unpack your suitcase

i dont wanna know if you playin' me, keep it on the low, coz my heart cant take it anymore ...

haha ... i spent today NOT studying even though i tried to. haha ... anyway,

here are some wonderful lyrics. enjoy! =)

I'm so sick and tired
of all these things
that drag me down
I've got no where to go
they say that life
is in these hands
you give everything
you give yourself away you give
and still you choke
and find yourself running for the door

come and take me
home
lead me to your door
take me where you are
lead me to your door
at least just for a while

its some kind of life
forever days
we're in the cold
unfamiliar way
so take this fear
and fade it out
it won't make me sad
cause I get sentimental Lord
in other ways
and I don't want to let me down here anymore

so come and take me home
lead me to your door
take me where you are
lead me to your door
and let me in
just let me in
and let me leave
just let me leave this world
come on now let me leave this world
at least just for a while

Dishwalla - Home

Corrie: i think you'll really like the song =)

they are not a christian band ... haha ... it doesnt mean when you have the word 'lord' in a song the song is chritian ... anyway Dishwalla is a pretty good band. haha ... i like this song!!!

ok anyway, i'm going out tomoro with old classmates and i hope i will not regret not studying tomoro. that's why this post is so short. i need to go off! haha ...

anyway, hope all is well for all, i actually have alot to talk abt, but at this point in time i'll have to wait for awhile. i shall now attempt to be the epitome of discipline. yeah for me. good luck eveyone. haha ... good night!

come take me home

This world, this world is cold
But you don't, you don't have to go
You're feeling sad you're feeling lonely
And no one seems to care
You're mother's gone and your father hits you
This pain you cannot bare

But we all bleed the same way as you do
We all have the same things to go thru

Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know

Your days you say they're way too long
And your nights you can't sleep at all (hold on)

And you're not sure what you're looking for
But you don't want to know more
And you're not sure what you're waiting for
but you don't want to know more

But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through

Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know

Don't stop looking you're one step closer
Don't stop searching it's not over...hoooo-ooold on

What are you looking for?
What are you waiting for?
Do you know what you're doing to me?
Go ahead...what are you waiting for?

Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking you're one step closer
Don't stop searching it's not over...
Hold on...if you feel like letting go
Hold on...it gets better than you know...hoooo-oold on

Hold On - Good Charlotte

i love this song ... i think it's great ... i realised all songs with meaning, with like really sweet/socailly critical/or just plain interesting lyrics appeal to me ... haha ... sentimental me ... =)

i am troubled by how friendships can be so shallow and pple dont see it ... even when it's out in the open pple cant see the futility of having that friendship. i mean, when you're openly slammin each other online and openly expressing your negative feelings toward each other, doesnt it show you how shallow the whole relationship is?

and just so i can add in my own thoughts, there are pple out here who really care, and you're pushing them away? i suppose it's a matter of who you treasure more ... and i think there's no way i can help becoz you've made sure of that ... why do the closest pple become the ones who are pushed away? wasnt there something we shared that could have showed enough sincerity to know i still care? PJ, i still care, and if you need anything at all, just call me ... i still love you alot as my best friend, and no one else can fill that space. miss you loads. will be sitting here waiting for you to accept me. til then, we'll just live in our own worlds.

ok that's it ... gotta run ...

come take me home

hold on if you feel like letting go ...

we got in we got in we got in!!!! haha ... ok ... sorry ... over reacting ... but we're busking for charity on the 10th of july!!!! yeah!!! *applause* haha!!! EXCEPT ... (i hate that word) ... we're gonna have some logistics problems ... like ... i need a battery operated amp ... or a portable something so that pple on the street can actually hear me ... haha ... maybe there's no need, but corrie's keyboard will overpower me ... i know ... haha ... i suppose it doesnt make a big diff ... but anyway ... to anyone: if you have a portable amp that runs on batteries, can you lend it to me?!!! pls!!!! haha ... :)

anyway, i went to chomp chomp today ... for pple who dunno, that's like the best place for BBQ seafood ... haha ... and it's kinda true ... i mean, there must be at least 4 or 5 stalls selling BBQ seafood, and apparently, they all taste almost the same ... haha ... well ... was just thinking how the competition could drive down prices ... yet, the increasing supply could drive up prices ... oh dear me ... i sound like an economist ... ha! too much econs in my head ... hehe ... but i feel like a bloated ballon now ... ha! ... ok ... i'm gonna shut up now ...

i just realised that today would have been a wonderful, significant day ... if i hadnt ended my relationshup with **** ... haha ... you know, i'm actually tired of fighting ... this thought just hit me, but i want to make peace, and i think her birthday would be a good time? i dunno ... maybe i'm, just doing this coz i want to get back with PJ and be friends again, but somehow i dont think it ends there ... ah well ... i think i should at least try ... hmm ... i wonder if she'll accept it ... haha ... oh dear ... i think i'm actually sincere abt this ... hmm ...

ok ... enough abt that i suppose ... ah well ... tell me if i should call this person ... to make peace ... there's just too much hurt in the world and in my life ... i suppose even if she rejects me, i dont mind ... i want to make peace, even when i blew my chance once ... just give it a shot? hmm ...

ok ... going to think now ...

come take me home

baby i'm amazed by you ...

i just thought of this other band that rocks ... Lonestar ... even though i only know 1 song ... i still like it! i mean ... haha ... nvm ... just a good song to listen to: Lonestar - Amazed ...

i'm thinking abt love now ... havin a conversation with corrie can be interesting ... here goes ... i wonder if love can transcend all barriers ... like barriers of gender, culture, time, reality, geographical distance, etc, etc ... i dunno what other types of barriers lah, but you get the point ... i suppose for some barriers it is transcendable ... but for others, for example: gender ... been thinking alot (i mean ALOT) about same-sex love ... i suppose there are a few types of love, two mainly, EROS and AGAPE ... and they each bring abt different connotations ...

EROS is sexual love ... in same-sex love i dont need to explain more right? haha ... i actually think most of what many pple mistake as eros is actually AGAPE or platonic love ... at least i've misinterpreted the types of love before ... ok twice ... ok fine ... like atleast 4 times ... haha ... you know how some pple just dont learn ... hehe ... anyway, i was thinking of the extent i'd go for my closer friends ... and i realised, the closest person, i'm willing to die for ... i mean, i'm a sentimental, really loving person i suppose ... but i really can safely say that if you're close enough, i'm ready to lay my life down for you, whether or not i love you in EROS or AGAPE ... i wonder how many pple would do that ... i suppose there will be many of them, who traesure human relationships as much as i do ... but to the extent of death? i dunno ... hmm ... but i love my friends alot, and life would be empty without them so then where's the point in living when those that make life good are gone? ok ... i'm just rambling ... but leave a comment if you have one on my tag ...

i met up with a long time friend today, someone i havent seen since getting my o level results ... actually i havent met my KC friends for a long time ... and i really miss them ... argh ... if only i didnt have stupid exams after the hols ... oh yeah, btw, i actually studied today ... quite well ... hah! yeahy for me ... but ecorns is really corny ... haha ... ;) i know you wanna slap me now ... haha ... i will be doing history ... i need to get french rev understood and out of the way ... there's still international history ... abt 8 days left ... i am sooooooooo screwed ... argh ... need to really pull my socks up ... haha ...

ok ... i should stop here ...

i can see clearly now the rain is gone

bye bye world ...

come take me home

i know you're out there ...

been blog surfing ... found many TSD pple's blogs ... i should be studying now but i'm so not starting ... like i know i'm screwd ... haha ... :) been reading my book ... Dan Brown's 'the da vinci code' ... some parts sent shivers down my spine ... i mean ... i know it's a work of fiction ... but still ... what if it's true?!! argh ... dont wanna comtemplate ...

i will believe that HE is my saviour, that HE is GOD ... and that HE is faithful and sinless. i will love HIM all my life

k ... now that that's out ... haha ... :)

what the hell am i doing online? ruining my life ... haha ... by not studying ... i shouldnt be slacking away, but then again ... WTH ... argh ... need to motivate myself to mug ... i hate my life ... argh ...

in the recent days my past fears have been abt relationships ... old and new ... i dunno how many pple read my blog ... *pls leave a tag or have a conversation with me there!!* gets depressing to kinda feel like no body reads ... haha ... so what's the point of posting right? argh ... i've been contemplating gettin myself up on my feet again. the motivated, once self-confident liting was burnt in the face of others ... i suddenly feel maybe i should grow into that again. haha ... kinda like the phoenix in Harry potter and the chamber of secrets ... burnt to the dust ... then reborn again ... the only fear is will pple like me still?

i've come to the conclusion that pple see me and they see the real me ... i dont bother to cover up my insecurities ... i guess i believe in being true to myself and everybody ... i mean, i dont want to put on layers and then to get to know me you hafta pull each layer off ... what you see is what you get ... it's as simple as that ... *hey that rhymes!* hehe ... i dont need to hide all the insides because i believe there's nothing to hide ... i dont need to be a loud mouth or miss personality to cover up anything ... some pple i know do that ... but that's their problem ... mine is i'm too open i suppose ... ah well ... just me doing my crazy rantings ... ;P

ok ... i think i better go do econs ... goal: to finish all econs notes at least once thru today ... ok ... this is do-able! let's go!!!

come take me home

i'm the playa who will fight for ya

i went to esplanade library yesterday and borrowed this book abt hip hop history ... it's damn cool ... but i made an interesting observation: all the women in hiphop, with small exceptions, are BIG ... hehe ... BIG is BEAOOOTIFUUL ... so encouraged ... i just wrote a rap ... written for a song Calin wrote ... gosh i can't wait to hear the product ... also wrote something else ... abt pimpin and playin' ... haha ... from a male perspective though ... i find it easier to write that way ...

don't worry ... i'm clear abt my sexuality

ah well ... i love hip hop man ... wanna see the lyrics for the rap i wrote? i extended it lah ... gave the shorter version first ... then decided to end it properly ... ok ... here it is:

baby girl
there's no one else in the world,
and if my time was up i would be incomplete without ya.
cause i wanna hold your hand,
i know it's simple and true,
and think of sweet little nothings just to say to you.
i know sometimes it gets hard being cold and alone,
but if you let me i will show you i can fight the cold,
coz you's my girl; i'm the playa who will fight for ya,
there aint no one else who these words will ever go out ta
listen,
i wanna drive you in my 24-inch rims,
give you diamonds and all of those things.
And no one else ever swim in the same sheets,
Cause you’s the one I see in my dreams.
Girl …

told you it's easier to write in this perspective ... abt love as you can see ... ah well ... i am a love sick puppy ... hehe ... been really into hiphop since i was really young ... i love black culture ... and i really respect it coz it's something deep in history ... i love HipHop ... it's that simple ... =) just too bad i cannot break ... wait ... i can ... break my bones that is ... hehe ... if i could i wanna break dance ... it's cool ... it's like the essence of hip hop ... the very thing hiphop evolved from ... ok ok .. .enuf abt that ...

i so need to study ... i'm wasting my life away man ... argh ... tomoro's target ... read and understand econs ... although i much rather start with history ... argh ... see how lah ... =) need motivation to study ... quick ... motivate me ... argh ... =P
ok ... i will start ... like now ... or should i sleep first and wake up early tomoro? think the latter is better ... or as dong would put it ... beta ... hehe ... miss you larz dong dong ... haha ... that sounded scandalous ... *oh no!* =)

anyway ... been playin lotsa pool again ... i will never get sick of that game man ... haha ... ok larz ... sometime got overkill ... but bridge wont have over kill ones ... haha ... official TSD game man ... i only learnt it recently and i'm like so hooked ... haha ... =)

workshop clean up was good today ... like the workshop's kinda cleaner now ... i mopped the costume room twice ... and the studio once ... haha ... thnx to all those who came man ... you guys are great ...

corrie: i really appreciate all that you're doing for me ... and you've really been a support that was really unexpected ... thanx for the help ... and as your name spelled backward reads out as 'i rock' (eirroc) ... you rock girl! we go jammin again sometime yeah ... =)

to you know who: got some thoughts ... i was just thinking that maybe we both remind each other too much of what we were like before / still am and so it's like it's damn painful for the both of us ... what do you think? drop me a msg the best way you deem fit ...

stinky: heyo ... sorry ... been really busy ... am gonna be buried in books soon ... i hope to meet up, but i dunno when ... love ya girl ... =) *long huggie*

ok world ... bye bye lah ... =P i must go now ...

come take me home

the past cannot be erased ... but it can be buried. tonight it has been taken out and thrown on the ground ... stamped on by my own feet, and the one who suffered in the end was no one else ... but me.

woah ... long title for a post ... haha ... i suppose when things do not go your way, then it all becomes too painful to face ... i mean, life throws at you what you throw at it ... only if you throw a pebble, you may get a rock in return ... haha ... i guess when something has too much attached to it, then the weight is too hard to hold ... starting to get philosophical ... haha ...

i'm out of love again ... what's new ... haha ... it haunts me that i'm alone ... everynight i almost writhe in fear of the prospect of being alone when i wake up ... i hate the cold barren state of 4 walls ... i get claustrophobic ... haha ... i guess that's why pple are so impt to me ... i cant bear to be alone ... it hurts too deeply ... well ... haha ...

i think God is trying to do something ... i still feel distant, but i want to be the prodigal daughter ... i want to return to being with Him ... i do miss the presence ... sighs ... i need Him more than ever now and i know it ... well ... this is a good time huh? i think not ... oh well ...

to you know who: i've done what i can and i wont say anything more ... just forget it ever happened and let it pass ... i hope that we still have friends in each other ... haha ... =)

there will be no more talk of this ... ever

i want to type lyrics again ... hehe ...

It's the perfect time of year
Somewhere far away from here
I feel fine enough I guess
Considering everything's a mess
There's a restaurant down the street
Where hungry people like to eat
I could walk but I'll just drive
It's colder than it looks outside

It's like a dream you try to remember but it's gone
Then you try to scream, but it only comes out as a yawn
When you try to see the world beyond your front door
Take your time, 'cause the way I rhyme's gonna make you smile
When you realize that a guy my size might take a while
Just try to figure out what all this is for

It's the perfect time of day
To throw all your cares away
Put the sprinkler on the lawn
And run through with my gym shorts on
Take a drink right from the hose
Change in to some drier clothes
Climb the stairs up to my room
And sleep away the afternoon

It's like a dream you try to remember but it's gone
Then you try to scream but it only comes out as a yawn
When you try to see the world beyond your front door
Take your time, 'cause the way I rhyme's gonna make you smile
When you realize that a guy my size might take a while
Just try to figure out what all this is for

Pinch me, pinch me 'cause I'm still asleep
Please God tell me that I'm still asleep

On an evening such as this
It's hard to tell if I exist
If I pack the car and leave this town
Who'll notice that I'm not around?
I could hide out under there
I just made you say underwear
I could leave, but I'll just stay
All my stuff's here anyway

It's like a dream you try to remember but it's gone
Then you try to scream, but it only comes out as a yawn
When you try to see the world beyond your front door
Take your time, cause the way I rhyme's gonna make you smile
When you realize that a guy my size might take a while
Just try to figure out what all this is for
Try to figure out what all this is for
Try to see the world beyond your front door
Try to figure out what all this is for

Barenaked ladies - Pinch me

ok ... i gtg now ... will be back

come take me home

jammin' good times do not last long enough ...

we went jammin' today ... sigh ... felt like a total flop. like i mean ... i think we're so gonna fall apart. damn ... i think we insult music ... i mean, we're all great musicians and all, but then ... we clash in terms of skill and style ... i must have been the most underskilled musician there lah ... sighs ...

enough abt that ... i'm in the midst of thinking of a rap for calin's song ... haha ... not as if i can freestyle well, but it's starting to sound quite cool ... if only i can remember the beat of the song ... hmm ... haha ... =)

so i confessed something yesterday ... to you know who: i'm sorry for the little misunderstanding i caused. i hope that it's ok with you now and things are back to the norm. we both know already you're not the one, so it's all good. haha ... sorry for my confusion. yeah ... =)

i miss PJ dearly ... sighs ... really hope she's doing ok ...

i'm kinda semi-jaded now ... had bailey's irish cream w/ milk and then proceeded for a vodka energy mix ... now i'm feeling abit off, like abit high ... havent had alcohol for awhile ... never had a good tolerance for alcohol anyway ... yeah ... wow ... woo hoo ... =)

ok ... i officially WANT to drop econs ... but i cannot because pple will not allow it. i suppose i could try to fight on ... but it's difficult. i will try for mid years ... then we'll see how ...

suffering from TSD hangover now ... miss crewing ... miss my seniors ... haha ... actually, they've become more like friends than seniors ... that's why this is such a sad parting ... but ... oh well, there are some pple you just cant get along with, so you just live and let live lah ... haha ...

gonna type the lyrics for a song now ... haha ...

I dig my toes into the sand
The ocean looks like a thousand diamonds strewn across a blue blanket
I lean against the wind
Pretend that I am weightless
And in this moment I am happy...happy

I wish you were here

I lay my head into the sand
The sky resembles a backlit canopy with holes punched in it
I'm counting UFO's
I signal them with my lighter
And in this moment I am happy...happy

I wish you were here

The world's a roller coaster and I am not strapped in
Maybe I should hold with care but my hands are busy in the air

wish you were here - Incubus

i love this funky song ... haha ... =) ok ... got nothing much left to say ... night you all ... love you world, too much that i want to leave ...

come take me home

as the confusion invades. will there be someway out?

i am such a pool freak ... thnx calin for getting me hooked again ... haha ... so fun ... i beat Dong, Calin and Nigel ... haha ... dont ask me how ... but i did ... Calin and Nigel coz i was lucky lah ... haha ... so fun ... i loved the break i pulled when i played with dong ... damn chio ... nicest break ever ... :)

so it's one more IS exam ... like it's tomoro and it's Nigel's ... haha ... my shirts!!! ah!!!! *panic* ... please dont be stained ... i LOVE those shirts ... i want to wear them again ... argh ... *heart ache* ...

ok ... so i told someone else today again ... at least she keeps me in check ... i wonder what's the point of posting ... nobody reads it anyway ... haha ...

but i am so confused ... i really want to get to know this person better ... but what are my reasons? purely platonic or do i have an ulterior motive? am i just making things up in my mind? sighs ... i want to love again ... but i know this is wrong ... sighs ... so confused ...

i need to be with Him alone ... God i need You ... but do i need You for the right reasons? sighs ... i think i really need help ... maybe i should look rowenna up again ... and i dont think i'm ready to face michelle (the KCian) ... and i dont think it's time to meet up yet ... i may be backsliding ... sighs! help help!!!!

i need to feel again ... so numb after endless slots ... kinda makes me wonder what i should do for exams next year ... i dont think i'll put in enough work ... i hope i will ... i want to ... but JC life is so high stress ... and 2 weeks of my study break are gone ... i will miss my seniors after this man ... need to break free ...

just thought of a cool song ... Wish you were here by incubus ... i like this song ... yeah! :) haha ...

PJ girl if you read this ... i really miss you ... i dunno what i did ... but our friendship has gone thru alot ... it can go thru this ... pls dont turn your back on me ... not for fifa ... not for anything else unless i did something ... i may have changed ... but i'm not a worse off person ... i have feelings too and i am not a super human ... i may not be as confident as i used to be ... i was never confident enough to begin with ... and you always thought of my rantings as irritation ... but those were real ... i listened and will continue to ... as long as you want it to be that way ... i cant tell you straight ... you're always too busy for me ... so i'll just hang around the sides and be there when you need me ... no probs ...

Nicole ... i dont think you'll read this ... but i'll just say your Mask piece was ok ... it was in fact, to me, wonderful ... i would have never been able to speak to pym like that ... like brandon said ... it may not have gone the way it should ... but it was nonetheless still good ... as long as it brought glory to God it's alright ... trust Him ... all that happened happened for a reason ... He will not let you down ...

Cal: hey yo wassup? :) just wanted to say that today was fantastic ... i will miss crewing for you ... i will miss working with all the crew members ... regardless if she's there or not ... :P haha ... anyway ... i'm very inspired to do sound now ... i just hope i'll have good juniors next year ... sorry if we were shit sometimes ... but we pulled thru ... :) yeah!

ok ... i think i'm going ... oh wait ... one more person ...

Stinky: miss you babes even though i saw you only the other day ... want you to know i love you loads and i hope you're feeling less pain. pain is a mental state of suffering ... just leave it alone and it will be gone. i will be around if you need company ... just a phonecall away yeah ... :) *hugs*

ok ... now i go ... bye world ... i want to leave for good ...

come take me home

loving again ...

hello world. =} so the group exams are over and the world is now looking to the Individual Skill exams ... haha ... quite tired ... but at least now 2 exams are over ... well ... 3 more to go ... then i get my life back for the time being ... haha ...

ok ... so i told calin some stuff ... kinda like talking to her ... have an inclination to trusting her ... didnt expect we'd have such a thing in common ... well ... haha ... =} break legs tomoro Cal. we your crew will be there ... it will be GREAT! =} yeah ...

Val's outta hospital. yeah! but now she's in pain ... i hope she's alright ... very worried for her ... sighs ...

i think i'm backsliding ... temptation being thrown at me from everywhere ... i really am scared of what i might do ... maybe i didnt change as much as i thought i did ... too many things coming back ... sighs ... i dont wanna lose touch with Him ... but it's getting difficult. it hurts ...

WJ's going. into camp lah ... army what ... well ... i think i'll miss him ... highly doubt it will be a returned emotion though ... Yihui's feeling the loss i think ... i dunno ... worried for her too ... she's sick ... sighs ... i wonder how she really feels abt him going into camp. sometimes i really rather not spend time with either of them ... makes me feel like a mosquito ... like always buzzing around ... makes me feel bad to be intruding ... should friends be feeling like this? somebody tell me ...

still tired of being what others want me to be ... but what do i wanna be? somebody tell me ... sighs ... then it's not quite what i want already huh? yeah ... sighs ... will stop here ... i need to study man ... sighs ...

peace out ya'll ...

come take me home